Cannibals Anonymous


Purpose
Provide help, support, and information to recovering cannibals in need of a sympathetic community.

Audience
Recovering cannibals in need of help and support from a sympathetic community.

Kind of Content:
Articles
Original Content
Sources of alternatives [Recipes?]
Images [Cannibal of the Month?]
Interviews

categories of content:
news items
events
about / mission
polls, anecdotes
discussion, interview...
Q and A
reader response, letters to the editor
membership form; Get More Involved
solicit contributors

Need for permissions? Copyright/Copyleft / Fair use?

Fair Use pictures of people or locations, such as a partk
Potential Fair Use picture of Hannibal Lecter [as found through CC 1.0 licensing search]

Tasks / Partners:
Theresa Hoffmann -Writer
Kristin Troilo - Writer
Brittany Viens - Writer

Frequency / Size / Design
Bimonthly - 14 pages

List of Potential Articles
"Foods That Look Like Human Brains But Aren't"
"Special interview with Hannibal Lecter"
"Albert Fish: The Craziest Cannibal Ever"
"A Successful Recovery"
"The Donner Party: Why It Was a Success"
"Mad Person Disease: How to Avoid the Zombie Plague"

Style

dates: 4 March 2012
use Oxford comma
colloquial language is okay
one space after periods

The Donner Party was a personal inspiration to me to become a cannibal. As you probably know, it is one of the biggest times the American people had to cannibalize each other, and although party meant the group of people, I always thought of it as the other kind. The fun kind. I imagined that rather than starve to death in that winter desert, they instead broke out their plates and cutlery, and sat down for a pleasant picnic. And so, we have to look at why this cannibal party was such a success.First off, frontier women were willing to stand up for themselves and be the cook. Doing so meant they had the strength to overpower the men. Nothing against you guys, but I’ve dated some male cannibals and they’ve always gone on about how much stronger they are then women. Please, when that party started the women were playing the hostess and Old Parson Brown was probably the first to go. Of course, they were very Martha Stewart about the whole thing, I’m suWith their subject chosen, they probably tied him up, cut out the different parts of the meat and got to roasting. All the while they set up a nice centerpiece from the bones they weren’t using, because honestly, any good dinner party needs decoration and style. They certainly didn’t clash with the wintery landscape. If they could find some left over cowhide there were also some fabulous place setters made. Also, I’m not sure if you know this, but snowshoes make wonderful makeshift grills. As they weren’t walking I’m fairly certain they were grilling up some delicious survivoSecond, those that did survive did so because they were able to cannibalize. We are survivors, even in recovery we know that if we had to, we could eat our neighbors. We know that you have to be willing to go that extra mile, and that the brains should be avoided at all costs. Sure they might seem delicious, but you should not do it. The Donner Party certainly did not since they made it to California eventually. Respecting this etiquette is perhaps another reason why the Donner Party worked so wonderfully
The last reason is, of course, because of the isolated area. This party was going someplace no one had ever been before. They were braving a new trail, and that meant, of course, being able to go some place no one else had been to before. It was the best place you could ever be if you plan on eating someone, which as we all know is something generally frowned upon in today’s society.


Beauty, elegance, courtesy and isolation. The Donner Party was a highly successful cannibal gathering for these reasons. I think if we were to get really desperate, we could hold our own Donner Party following these rules. It would have to be someplace just as desolate of people, and we could certainly do better than snowshoe grills. We could bring steak (of the cow variety) and have a ball. Next time you want to be successful at a gathering, follow the Donner Party rules: Take advice from the woman in your life and never serve brain.



Final Edited Files

Images
Someone grilling on a snow shoe? (Brittany)
CA logo (Brittany)
Albert Fish
Fish's Pelvis
Hannibal Lecter
zombie
walnut = brain

cover image?


Thar Be Images
CA Logo
zombies
donner party
fish clean up = wip
walnut

theresa.png..brii.pngkristin.png

To Do:
Brittany: write "About CA", finish images
Kristin: Finish laying out newsletter
Theresa: Figure out bylines, write article intros
All: write "About Me" & find photo

Rough Newsletter [text only]:
Rough Text Only
With Pics

CA Cover

This is It!
Final